When a community loses a young friend
‘Hey brother, Brock;
we’re gonna miss you’
By Tony Ullrich
SBA Contributing Writer
© 2009, The Sergeant Bluff Advocate. All rights reserved.
“I believe that imagination is stronger than knowledge, myth is more potent than history, dreams are more powerful than facts, hope always triumphs over experience, laughter is the cure for grief, love is stronger than death.” – Robert Fulghum
(Sloan, IA) – When you lose a friend, a neighbor, your own life changes. Even more, when you learn about an accident that nearly took the lives of five students and coach, and the death of the driver of the other car, it changes your life. Two instances; two circumstances, both within three weeks of one another, hits a person hard. If it’s a small town, like Sloan, it strikes everyone.
But my next door neighbor, my friend, Brock Thorpe, left the world we know, Wednesday, Nov. 26, 2008. He was 21 years old. I don’t understand. I didn’t understand it then, and I am coming to grips with it only now. I don’t know how someone I knew, who smiled and enjoyed life as much as Brock did, could leave behind a mother, father, sister and half-sister to carry the sorrow they feel. I don’t understand why any of this happened. I really don’t.
Brock graduated from Westwood High School in 2005. He was a regular guy. He played basketball – his favorite (and he was really good at it) – football, track and baseball. I don’t remember him as a star basketball player, but I do remember he was a contributor – a strong contributor, what people call a team player.
By the time he was a senior, Brock was 6’1” and weighed about 175 pounds. He was by every stretch of the imagination, an athlete. He really was. I played basketball with Brock. In practice, he was a guy who wanted to have fun, but he also was a team motivator. In the locker room, he would be total encouragement to each of us. He had this propensity for coming up with nicknames for everyone. He called me “Two-tone,” and I think it’s because my first name is Tony… you know, like Tony-Two-tone. It was funny and it made me laugh.
Just little things. He’d call most of us by our last names. We had fun with him, too. Like we all came back with a nickname for him. We dropped the “r” out of his first name and called him Bock. He’d laugh and it made us all feel good that we got him to find what we said, funny.
I had class with Brock his senior year when I was a junior. In physics, I recall, he was the same way as on the basketball court. He wanted to have fun. One of Brock’s buddies hid in a class darkroom. When Brock walked by, his friend jumped out trying to scare Brock. Thorpe jumped a little, but I remember how his face beamed with one big smile. He didn’t ever get angry. Intense, maybe, in sports, but never angry.
In his early years – like elementary and junior high – Brock was kind of a bully; I don’t mean in a bad sense. It was just the way he came off to younger kids. He changed a lot, though, once he entered high school. I saw him as a protector in high school. He was always looking out after other peoples’ well-being. He cared about you. He cared about me.
Last summer, he told my Dad (Tom), that he always made it a point to look after me. He told his own parents that about me. I don’t know why this was? Maybe because I was younger and smaller? I don’t know. I just know that he looked after me. Like in sports, he made sure no one picked on me. Brock didn’t like anyone being abusive in what they said to one another. I mean, Brock not only did that for me, but he also did the same for other kids at Westwood.
A week ago (Friday, Jan. 2, 2009), I visited his grave. I had trouble finding where he was buried at the Sloan Cemetery. Someone there helped me locate Brock’s resting place. When I saw the grave marker, I didn’t know what to think. A lot of things came rushing in on me… a lot of memories. I am not ashamed to say I talked with him. I told him I had written to his Facebook and left some final words for him. I read what I had written: “Hey brother Brock, I’m gonna miss you! I have known you for as long as I can remember ...it will never be the same without you -- when I drive by your house, when I come home. We’ll forever be the “Brown Street Bombers.” You'll be in my prayers. With love, your neighbor, Tony.”
Others – in fact, dozens and dozens of classmates along with Westwood and Sloan friends – have written at Brock’s Facebook site. His passing has weighed on all of us.
I think there are people out there who see kids and teenagers as worry-free. They see us as not thinking, not having thoughts of our own, not having feelings… but we do. No matter how we may look individually and no matter how happy we may appear, we have feelings, too.
It might surprise many of you reading this that there are so many my age who have written on Brock’s Facebook page. You have no idea how his leaving us the way he did, so suddenly, affects us. You really don’t.
Here is what just a few of his friends wrote:
Jed wrote:
I miss you so much, man ...it’s still hard for me to realize that you’re gone, but I know you’re with me right now while I’m listening to music and looking at all your pics. I find myself doing that quite a bit. I’m sure you know I’ve been trying to write a song about you, but it’s kinda hard getting through it, so hopefully someday I’ll be able to. Geoff and I had a good New Year’s in Cedar Falls and Bobby came to visit. Of course, I was being an idiot and tried to pick a fight with the biggest guy at my house, over someone eating my pizza; I missed you whispering in my ear behind me saying, “I got your back,” no matter how dumb the situation was …Haha, man, those were the days. Love you!
Ben wrote:
I was just lookin’ at a few of these posts on your wall Brock...and I’ve never got goose bumps the way that I just did ...I miss you so much, man ...words just don’t do justice for how much you're missed by everyone ...I love ya kid ...I was talkin’ to Heck yesterday and we were talking about how [things are]. We came to the conclusion that we’re gonna make a lil trip to Cedar Rapids and if you were here I know you’d already be sittin’ in the front seat of the car waiting to make the jaunt ...take care homey.
Kayla wrote:
I miss you and I love you ...this will be the hardest Christmas yet! I still can’t believe you’re gone ...when I think about it I cry. I just wish we could turn back the hands of time and make this all go away; but since we can’t, please keep watching over us and know that the whole family loves and misses you every minute of everyday! I hope you have a Merry Christmas and I will see you later!
Krissy wrote:
Brock …you are beautiful; always have been; always will be. I miss you. I think about our listening to Diamond Rio together. I wish I could have been there for you. I love you. Always watch over the people you love.
Stephanie wrote:
Merry Christmas! I miss you. Still not a day that goes by where I don’t think about you. I wish you were here with us. Keep watching over your friends and family and we will get together in the future. Love ya Brock!
Geoff wrote:
Hey Boooooock, I’ve come to write on your wall now about a hundred times and words don’t come out. Usually I have something to say. Over the last few years we have had some pretty good times huh? Some of [those times] are a little blurry, but you understand ;). I’m gonna miss ya man, and I know a lot of other people that will too. Take care of yourself up there, and watch over the rest of us down here. Until next time. ~Your Buddy.
From a good friend:
Basically, Brock and I met around April 2007 at Kirkwood through a girl I was dating at the time; we immediately hit it off. It wasn’t until the end of the summer when we really started hanging out together. Brock very soon became one of my best friends and we were very close. Brock and I were often mistaken for each other -- brothers, or twins -- at least 50 times ...not kidding. At times it drove us nuts, but then it also had its perks; at parties, girls would ask us if we were brothers, or twins, and we would play along with them just for a good laugh or two. Brock and I were also very good friends with Geoff, who is now my roommate at Cedar Falls; Geoff was a little closer to Brock because they were at school together before I came along. Geoff moved to Cedar Falls while Brock and I were at Kirkwood. We would go up to Cedar Falls a lot and visit with Geoff. From all the people that Brock met at Kirkwood, I would say that Geoff and I were probably his closest friends and it hit us very hard, especially because people were constantly calling and texting us after hearing about his passing. Brock and I stayed up countless nights just sitting in my garage waiting for the sun to come up or until neither of us could keep our heads up. Haha. As everyone knows the first thing about Brock is his stories; when you sit with him all night long you hear a lot of stories. I would hear stories about Charles and my best buddy this, my best buddy that, and usually hear about them 3-4 times in a night and somehow they always changed a little bit each time and got more dramatic as the story went on. Brock always had my back whether it was in some dumb fight or just to be there to talk and listen; and, he knew I always had his. We talked about our childhood, sports, family, girls, and being in each other’s wedding someday; I would give anything to hear another story or to sit up with Brock all night again. At his funeral, Geoff and I were there along with others, but I knew a lot of other people from Kirkwood; I also had the pleasure of meeting his amazing family and friends that I heard so much about; it was almost like I knew them already. I was very happy to have met them and spent time with them; I just wish it was under different circumstances.
If there’s anything positive to ever come out of a situation like this, Brock brought many people a lot closer together and definitely made me cherish my family and friends and every moment I have with them. I could write a book on all the different stories from moments we shared.
ED. NOTE. The Advocate wishes to extend its gratitude to Tony Ullrich for writing this very difficult remembrance. We also wish to extend our sincere sympathy to Brock’s parents, Charles and Sandy Thorpe, family members and friends of Brock Thorpe, and indeed the entire Sloan community on this most grievous loss. In writing this difficult remembrance, Tony Ullrich adhered to the Thorpe family’s wishes and requests.
